Whole Again

Seven years ago, in the spring of 2000, Amy Grant and I said "I do" under an arbor on a hill at her farm in Tennessee. The sweetest woman in the world wore flowers in her hair, and as we recited our vows, I cried. The view from the hilltop that day made me think I could see forever, which is how a man feels when he's finally complete. I tell Amy all the time, "You have no idea how amazing it is to be whole again."

I was pretty miserable there for a while. My first marriage ended in divorce, and in the middle of that, my father died. I turned to food for comfort. Though I was as thin as a rail growing up in Oklahoma City, that all began changing in my late 30s. I'd try something like the Atkins diet, and the weight would come off. But it would come right back on again. I wasn't learning how to eat; I wasn't doing my body any good.


I never did have a lot of discipline, which is one of the ways Amy and I are opposites. She pushed me to find a trainer, a guy named Raymond Harvey at the YMCA in Nashville, where we live. When I first went to see him, Raymond asked, "What are your goals?" I said, "I don't want to be big. I hate this. I want to be lean." So I quit drinking nine sodas a day. For breakfast, I eat oatmeal and egg whites. I see Raymond three times a week.

I've lost 30 pounds, and my body is much more toned. It feels great. I want to lose a total of 50 pounds by my 50th birthday, in April. I think Amy will hold me to it: She's big on planning ahead. It's another one of her strengths; she has a lot of them.

I fell in love with her the first time we really talked. It was in '93, when I invited her to be a guest on my Christmas TV special. With her enormous popularity as a Christian singer, I knew she'd be great on the show. And as we spoke, I instantly felt comfortable. I thought, Wow, what a neat person. But we were both married.

In 1994, Amy and I recorded a pop duet, "House of Love," and as we got to be better friends, we couldn't deny that we really liked each other. When two people click, there's not much you can do about it. She and I just shared so much: music, golf, even our names (my middle name is Grant). In 1997, my marriage broke up.

Completely on her own, Amy's marriage also ended, in 1999, though it was tough for both of us to have people passing judgment on our friendship and, often, thinking the worst. Amy and I didn't plan what happened. But we belonged together. We just fit.

These days, Amy and I work with each other a lot, doing shows or cowriting songs. But our private life is our priority. Our daughter Corrina, who is five years old, is the center of our world. She's the bridge between our families -- Amy's two daughters, Sarah and Millie, and her son, Matt, and my grown daughter, Jenny. Corrina is such a happy, confident child. She's been an amazing gift to all of us.

I don't want to be big. I hate this. I want to be lean. I always say she's a little Amy because, like her mom, she doesn't have an unkind bone in her body. Amy always looks at the positive side of things. She got me going to church again after a long lapse; she showed me by example how to live my faith. Sometimes, after our Christmas concerts, she'll spend three hours doing meet-and-greets with fans. Over and over again, people will come through the line and say to me, "Nice show." Then they'll turn to Amy and say, "You can't imagine how you've changed my life." They will tell her their story. Amy listens to every single one.

She never stops giving. When the Nashville Symphony went bankrupt in the '80s, she began appearing with them. Their CEO said revenue from her performances paid off their debt -- about $1 million in total. Amy helped raise another million toward the group's new home, the Schermerhorn Symphony Center.

Her example really inspired me to step up my own charity work. The Home Depot folks and I built a new playground at a New Orleans school last fall. It felt great to help give the kids a place to play and a reason to smile.

There's just no overestimating the power of a second chance, which is what I feel I got by marrying Amy. She's helped me get over my toughest trait of all -- a bad temper. Amy helped me see the value of calmly discussing issues, not just venting emotions. I got my self-respect back. And that is no small thing.

Our marriage has brought me total peace. I cannot imagine life without this woman, so when I say I can see forever, Amy's always in the picture.